God Calls Us to Resolve Conflict by Focusing on the Things That Unite Believers in Christ
OPENING PRAYER:
Dear Jesus, open my mind and heart to truly hear your words today. Amen.
As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. Ephesians 4: 1-6 (NIV)
REFLECT:
Throughout the first half of Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, he presents the wondrous truths of God’s saving work in Jesus Christ. In the second half of his letter (beginning in Chapter 4) Paul urges and instructs the Ephesian believers to respond practically to the truths he had just presented. He appeals to these believers to walk in a manner worthy of their calling, diligently preserving the unity of the Spirit in the body of Christ.
Paul’s plea is for Christians to live in a manner worthy of their calling, which means living in visible, loving harmony with other Christians. God Himself exists as a loving unity of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and all three persons of the Trinity work to establish unity between believers. God the Spirit places Christians in the body of Christ, secures their shared hope, and produces unity in the church. God the Son unites in Himself those who are identified with Him through their confessed faith and baptism also producing unity in the church, and God the Father is the ultimate author and basis of oneness in the church. Christians are to live out in practice the unity that the Father, Son, and Spirit have already established in the church.
APPLY:
Christians are called to enjoy the riches of the gospel and live lives worthy of this calling. It’s important in Ephesians to understand that it is not “if you obey me, then you will be blessed,” rather it is, “you are so blessed, so now in response to my love and grace, here is how we live.” This means treating other believers with humility, gentleness, patience, tolerance, and love.
However, in this world conflict is a part of life. Anytime you have a disagreement with someone, you have the presence of conflict and all the emotions that surround such discord. Working through conflict can be painful, but God wants us to love all people and work hard to maintain unity. In Ephesians 4:3 (NIV), God instructs us to “Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” Staying in conflict is not His will, and we are to exhaust our efforts to attain unity.
Satan revels in such disunity that leads to anger, unforgiveness, and hatred that starts with a disagreement. If that’s where it starts, that’s where it should stop. As the disagreement continues, the reactions become more complicated. To stop conflict at the point of disagreement takes God’s help. He wants us to love people by His standard and with His capacity. In these circumstances, God will always give the grace needed to manage the conflict, and the Holy Spirit will remind you of His provision and help steer conflict in a spirit of love.
When managing conflict submit your thinking to the Lord. Growing in God’s love will strengthen your character, as you grow in the ability to deter your thoughts and words from running rampant during conflict. Instead submit your thoughts and words to the Lord in those moments. Ask the Lord to help you rethink your word choice. Are your thoughts pure, peace loving, considerate? Are they coming from a place of humility, mercy, and sincerity?
Early on in my elementary teaching career, when I considered my class management, I knew I had to keep things simple, direct, appropriate, and true. I settled on one class “rule,” or action statement and/or pledge, that served me well for my thirty-three years in the classroom: “I will do what’s necessary, helpful, and kind.” Each morning after reciting the Pledge of Allegiance and the school’s pledge, my class would add this classroom pledge. Then throughout the school day when any type of conflict would arise, my first question to those involved would be, “Was this necessary, helpful, or kind?” If they answered, “No,” to any part of this statement then they would be reminded that it wasn’t something they should have taken part in and needed to find a way to make amends. There would be consequences of some kind, as there always is for our behaviors. I’d like to think that somehow this helped shape their character for the better. I am now retired and still continue to hear these words each day, as I believe the age of the “child” does not matter when strengthening character.
God’s word says this in James 3:17, “But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.” I believe that these words can transform believers, producing the strength of restraint and wisdom in navigating conflict.
Remember our calling is to Christ and His mission. Let us preserve unity knowing who God is, what He is doing, and who He says we are in light of who He is.
CLOSING PRAYER:
Dear God, help me love better. Let me know, and do, because you are a God who knows your children and has done everything that is needed for me to be reconciled to you. Help me live with others in visible, loving unity that reflects and honors you. Amen.